I'm so freaking upset I could cry...

So I'm getting ready for work this morning and who should show up at the door but my mother in law. Of course no call ahead to let us know she was off work and stopping by, so the house wasn't at it's most stellar. And she's very judgemental of that kind of thing.

Scott told her not to say anything about the mess because he had been working on the roof the night before and finally got that done. Out of the corner of my eye (I was talking to Mason) I see her gesture at me like "what was SHE doing?". UGH! I feel so much distaste for this woman. I hate that Scott doesn't call her on things like that, doesn't tell her she cannot come into my home and treat me like that! And bear in mind, this "mess" was really only dishes in the sink and some toys out. I had vacuumed and swept the night before so it's not like it was a disaster area. But no matter, if any little thing isn't done, she notices it.

I feel guilty because they're constantly buying things for the kids. Big things. Like for Maddie's birthday they got her a new bedroom set. I feel like she does that so she has strings to yank us around by.

If it were up to me, our relations with her would be strictly limited. Even her other son and his girlfriend laugh and say they couldn't live near her. She is extremely negative and brings that energy into our house. Maddie won't stay with her. Mason gets really upset anytime she comes into the house. Gage is okay with her, mainly because he's her favorite. And Scott just says to ignore her. I can't when she's in my house! He wants us all to be this close knit family but that just won't be happening. I can't stand this woman. She has burned too many bridges in the last 13 years and there's no way they're going to be built back up.

I try to be accepting and assume innocence and all that new age stuff but with her, I can't. I can't even do a good loving kindness meditation for her (back when I was trying to do those! maybe I need to start trying again). I want to be away from her, I want to know her negative influences can't touch my kids. But how can I do this when Scott is still trying to be the dutiful son? He has tried, a few times, to get tough with her but it never helps. She'll back off for a few days then come right back at us. And it's not as if she gets positive reinforcement, we never make the changes she harps about. You'd think at some point she'd realize she' s not making headway and she'd stop!

I'm so upset right now.