A couple weeks ago, I was out grocery shopping with my daughter, my sister and her daughters. We were just strolling through the store when this guy catches my eye...I know him...who is he...oh..my..gosh...it's my ex-fiance. I was engaged to him before I met Scott. Well, I was still engaged to him when I met Scott but I digress..

He looked so much older..granted we're both almost 15 years older but he's got gray hair and everything. He's with his wife and two kids, he doesn't see me or pretends not to anyway, as I do the same thing. I feel an odd glee that his wife isn't thin either lol. And I think at one point I saw him actually hit one of his kids. So there are no feelings of "what if" on my part. More a sigh of relief.

Well, I shouldn't say that. I DID think "what if"...what if I hadn't met Scott, what if I didn't have my three fantastic kids, what if my life had been different than the pretty good set up I've got going now. I know that Greg and I were not going to go the distance, I'm not sure why I accepted that marriage proposal (other than the fact that it was Christmas morning and his whole family was there, in on the whole thing. And this was back when I was really into long haired artist types.) I knew we were not going to make it when he let me be goaded into a decision that I didn't want to make, he didn't stand up for me, for us. He didn't stop me. I blame myself mostly for this particular decision but still. He was there and let it happen. There would always be that hole in our relationship. I do wonder now if he ever thinks about that time and wonders "what if". I do sometimes, but I know that were it not for that decision I would not have the life I have now, not at all.

It was really odd seeing him..I guess I had this mental picture of what he would be like now and it's way off.