Monday, April 07, 2003

I seriously think that once you hit your childbearing years you become a slave to your hormones; at least where childbearing is concerned. I admire those women who can put it off or even ignore the pull of babies. I really do.

I’m not one of them. I've come to the realization that I' m the type of woman who will never feel "done" having kids. When I was a teenager, I told anyone and everyone that I would never marry and absolutely never have kids. Just wasn’t crazy about them. They were alright, but way too much work for this lazy gal. People said I would change my mind, and I assured them that I would not. I met my now-husband and fell hard for him; we lived together but I still had no real urge to get married. Then I hit the ripe old age of 22. I’m sure the little guys controlling my hormones had been on sabbatical until then. They must have just noticed that they had turned off the biological clock! Oh no! All of a sudden I adored babies; just loved them; salivated over them in fact. Yes, let’s get married so we can have itty bitty baby-wabies!! I was a slobbering mess...

So we got married and had our first baby. It was bliss, it was wonderful! Life was good. Then he hit two years old and the old hormones started churning again. Baby, baby, BABY!!! So we had our daughter. And we were done! Surely we were done, right?! I felt done. For the most part...

But then the old baby lust kicked in again. Baby, baby, BABY! Now we have three kids. Three. From the girl who said she’d never push forth a babe from her loins. From the girl who never wanted a lot of responsibility. I feel like that guy from the commercial...the thought that I am responsible for another human life is utterly ridiculous! But I love my kids...god I love ‘em! And guess what...this time the hormone guys know I’m their bitch. They had me at hello. Baby, baby BABY!!

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